DJC#021 – Packing Your Bag of Belief: How To Become Your Child’s #1 Fan

Throughout your child’s life, they will have their ups and downs. They’ll have their struggles and those lesson-learned moments as they figure life out for themselves. Your advice will only go so far – I mean how many times did you ignore your parents’ advice only to find out they actually knew what they were talking about?

Kids will experiment with liking this one day, and by tomorrow they’ll be liking that, which is perfectly okay and a great thing in my opinion – they’re experimenting. At some point, they will start to really take an interest in an activity, hobby, creative outlet, sport, business, and anything else you can dream up. It’s in these moments we must put your ego aside and let them live their life. It’s not yours to live, you have your own life. Instead, become their #1 fan.

You might think, I’m already my child’s #1 fan. While that may be true, as they become older, there can be moments where your child is doing something that you wouldn’t do, weren’t into or don’t understand. It’s during these moments we have a unique opportunity to shape our children’s sense of self-worth and confidence by simply believing in them.

The Greatest Gift

Jim Valvano was a revered college basketball coach who shared a story about how his Dad gave him the greatest gift ever. After landing his first coaching job, he shared his goal of winning a National Championship with his Dad who replied, “I’ll be there.” It took Coach Valvano 8 years just to make the tournament he wanted to win. After finally qualifying for the tournament, his Dad called him into his bedroom to show him something – a suitcase in the corner. “My bags are packed,” his Dad told him. When you play and win that National Championship I’m going to be there, my bags are already packed.”

Multiple seasons went on where Coach Valvano fell short of his goal. But then in 1983, his team had a magical run in the tournament and won the National Championship…and his Dad was there to celebrate with him. Even in the seasons after winning, his Dad continued to say his “bags were packed” when every March would come around. What this Dad was really saying to his son all these years is, I believe in you. It was that belief from his Dad, that helped Coach Valvano reach his goal of leading his team to the title.

“My father gave me the greatest gift anyone could give another person, he believed in me.” – Jim Valvano.
The Gift My Father Gave Me – YouTube

Cheering from the Sidelines: The Impact of Belief

Imagine the impact when you’re there, front and center, cheering your child on during every step of their journey. From their first wobbly bicycle ride to their soccer games, big science fair presentation, or talent show performance, your belief in their abilities sends a powerful message. It tells them that they are capable, worthy, and loved unconditionally. When you’re their biggest fan, you instill in them the confidence to take on challenges, embrace their strengths, and work through their weaknesses.

Planting Seeds of Self-Belief

Your belief in your child acts as a seed that grows into a robust tree of self-assurance. When they see you unwaveringly believing in them, they learn to believe in themselves. This self-belief becomes a constant companion as they navigate the ups and downs of life. Your encouragement creates a strong foundation, allowing them to face setbacks with resilience and stride toward success with determination.

Championing Resilience and Perseverance

Life isn’t always a smooth ride, and challenges are inevitably in the forecast. By being your child’s biggest fan, you teach them the art of resilience and perseverance. When they stumble, they know you’re there to catch them, but also to guide them back on their feet. Your unwavering support helps them develop a “never give up” attitude, fostering a spirit of determination that will serve them well in adulthood.

Tips for Being Your Child’s #1 Fan:

So you’re all onboard with this, but wondering how do I actually go about doing this? Well here are 5 tips to help you be your child’s #1 fan:

Active Listening: Take time to listen to your child’s dreams, fears, and aspirations. Show them that their thoughts and feelings matter.
Celebrate Effort: Praise their hard work, dedication, and effort, rather than just focusing on the outcomes.
Create a Safe Space: Let them know it’s okay to make mistakes…or they should be making mistakes and that failures are necessary for opportunities for growth.
Lead by Example: Model self-belief and resilience in your own life, showing them how to overcome challenges.
Embrace Individuality: Celebrate their unique qualities and interests, helping them embrace what makes them special.

Conclusion

As we start another week of parenting, let’s remember that our unwavering belief in our children can ignite a spark of confidence that will light their path throughout life. By being their biggest fan, we set them on a course for success, resilience, and happiness.

Here’s to cheering for our children today, tomorrow, and always.

P.S. I’d love to hear your stories of how being your child’s biggest fan has made a difference in their lives. Share your experiences with the Dad Journal Club community!